Not the kids.
Me.
Tomorrow the kids start school. And even though I have been looking forward to it for a while now, today I am feeling ambivalent. I am a little nervous of the unknown: unknown school, unknown friends, unknown teachers. All for fifteen hours a week. When they go to school tomorrow, it will be their first step into the real world here in Singapore.
Yes, I know this is just preschool.
Still. I have been thinking of their teachers, how they have the power to build up or tear down my children, through the interactions that they will have. I wonder if they will ever know how much they have been prayed for and prayed over.
Monday, June 30, 2008
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Saturday, June 28, 2008
bambini
We came home to discover that indoor playgrounds have sprouted up in different places in Singapore over the past year! Woo-hoo!
The fun-nest part for me: seeing J taking his mei-mei by hand and guiding her along some of the more complicated parts of the play structure (so that she can get to the top of the slide), and then getting to watch them pop out of the end of the slide one after another in quick succession with big grins on their faces.
The second best part: having two very tired kids by the end of the day.
The fun-nest part for me: seeing J taking his mei-mei by hand and guiding her along some of the more complicated parts of the play structure (so that she can get to the top of the slide), and then getting to watch them pop out of the end of the slide one after another in quick succession with big grins on their faces.
The second best part: having two very tired kids by the end of the day.
Friday, June 27, 2008
baby steps
Thank you to all who covered us in prayer today.
The interview went very smoothly. The assessor was very friendly, and all she really wanted was to have more details to put into her report. Mostly, it was just us elaborating on what we had already written in our application form. The interview took about two hours, but wasn't too difficult really.
What's left on the to-do list:
- we still have a couple of documents to submit (each time we think we are done with the checklist of documents, we find we have to hand in something else!);
- we have to attend a compulsory workshop next month (and figure out what to do about childcare for J and E while we're there);
- we have to schedule a time for the assessor to visit us at home (probably in the next week or two)
We would love your prayers over these too!
The interview went very smoothly. The assessor was very friendly, and all she really wanted was to have more details to put into her report. Mostly, it was just us elaborating on what we had already written in our application form. The interview took about two hours, but wasn't too difficult really.
What's left on the to-do list:
- we still have a couple of documents to submit (each time we think we are done with the checklist of documents, we find we have to hand in something else!);
- we have to attend a compulsory workshop next month (and figure out what to do about childcare for J and E while we're there);
- we have to schedule a time for the assessor to visit us at home (probably in the next week or two)
We would love your prayers over these too!
Thursday, June 26, 2008
first interview
We have our first interview for our home study report tomorrow afternoon. Please keep us in prayer, that we may find favour with the authorities, and that the process will go smoothly.
***
I tore into today's mail because our adoption agency had told me yesterday that a CD was on its way to us. We now have a few more updated photos and three teensy-weensy short video-clips. In one of them, Noah is crying.
I did not know it, but I had forgotten what a new baby's cry sounds like. In my life right now, the cries are angry, loud and fierce. Noah's cry is plaintive, and as he cries, his arms flail helplessly.
How I long to sweep him into my arms, to comfort him, to tell him, "It's going to be ok, little one."
***
I tore into today's mail because our adoption agency had told me yesterday that a CD was on its way to us. We now have a few more updated photos and three teensy-weensy short video-clips. In one of them, Noah is crying.
I did not know it, but I had forgotten what a new baby's cry sounds like. In my life right now, the cries are angry, loud and fierce. Noah's cry is plaintive, and as he cries, his arms flail helplessly.
How I long to sweep him into my arms, to comfort him, to tell him, "It's going to be ok, little one."
breathless
My plate feels a little too full.
My online classes at Fuller Theological Seminary started this week. I am more than slightly intimidated, and am feeling very overwhelmed. I am just not sure that I am up to balancing this with the kids, the adoption paperwork, the new baby (when he comes), and managing the preschoolers' class at church.
I am reminding myself that I can do all things through Christ.
But I am still feeling breathless. I wonder what a panic attack feels like. Because what I am feeling sure feels like one.
My online classes at Fuller Theological Seminary started this week. I am more than slightly intimidated, and am feeling very overwhelmed. I am just not sure that I am up to balancing this with the kids, the adoption paperwork, the new baby (when he comes), and managing the preschoolers' class at church.
I am reminding myself that I can do all things through Christ.
But I am still feeling breathless. I wonder what a panic attack feels like. Because what I am feeling sure feels like one.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
bug a-crawling
We saw a bug a-crawling on our evening walk yesterday, which led to a little debate over what kind of bug it was.
K: It's a worm.
J: No, dad! It has legs... Worms don't have legs...
We think now that it was a little caterpillar.
K: It's a worm.
J: No, dad! It has legs... Worms don't have legs...
We think now that it was a little caterpillar.
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Sunday
Whenever I get depressed by a lack of spiritual progress, I realise that my very dismay is a sign of progress. I have the sense of slipping further from God mainly because I have a clearer idea of what God desires and how far short I fall.
Philip Yancey, Prayer: Does it make any difference?
Thursday, June 19, 2008
two months today
Our newest baby turns two months old today, and we have no way to give him an extra-special cuddle. We are saving all the cuddles up for when we finally meet him!
We have been asked why we've decided to adopt. In our culture, adoption is viewed with some ambivalence. It is usually a last resort, and is often accompanied by whispers and sidelong glances. We have met with some people, even in church, who do not understand why we would want to adopt. Here's our answer, give or take a few words...
We have felt God leading us to this decision, which we made not rashly but deliberately. This is the gist of it: this baby is God's plan for us, as much as J and E are God's plan for our family.
God is the defender of the fatherless, and he calls us to do the same (Isaiah 1:17). One of our dearest friends gave me much food for thought when she said when we adopt, we get a little peek into our Father's heart, His love for the fatherless, the orphans and the lost.
We are God's adopted children too (Ephesians 1:3-6). There is nothing to be embarrassed about. Because God adopted us, we are now members of his household and we are his children and his heirs. This is what I want to tell him when I finally meet him: Never be ashamed because you are adopted. God adopted us, and it is a beautiful thing.
His name will be Noah, which I think sounds strong and solid. It means peace, rest and comfort. Just as the biblical Noah stood firm, obeying God even when he was laughed at and mocked, we pray that our Noah will also be strong and stand firm, if and when he meets people who do not understand how beautiful adoption is.
We have been asked why we've decided to adopt. In our culture, adoption is viewed with some ambivalence. It is usually a last resort, and is often accompanied by whispers and sidelong glances. We have met with some people, even in church, who do not understand why we would want to adopt. Here's our answer, give or take a few words...
We have felt God leading us to this decision, which we made not rashly but deliberately. This is the gist of it: this baby is God's plan for us, as much as J and E are God's plan for our family.
God is the defender of the fatherless, and he calls us to do the same (Isaiah 1:17). One of our dearest friends gave me much food for thought when she said when we adopt, we get a little peek into our Father's heart, His love for the fatherless, the orphans and the lost.
We are God's adopted children too (Ephesians 1:3-6). There is nothing to be embarrassed about. Because God adopted us, we are now members of his household and we are his children and his heirs. This is what I want to tell him when I finally meet him: Never be ashamed because you are adopted. God adopted us, and it is a beautiful thing.
His name will be Noah, which I think sounds strong and solid. It means peace, rest and comfort. Just as the biblical Noah stood firm, obeying God even when he was laughed at and mocked, we pray that our Noah will also be strong and stand firm, if and when he meets people who do not understand how beautiful adoption is.
Monday, June 16, 2008
G6PD
We learned a few days ago that our baby is G6PD deficient. What this means basically is that he lacks a certain enzyme that helps his red blood cells function normally. He will have to avoid certain medications and foods his whole life, and may react more severely to certain infections.
We are still planning on adopting him.
This deficiency should not stop him from leading a full, healthy life; we just have to be a bit more careful with medications and food. Here's the Godstop: we know three of the youths in our church here, who have this same deficiency, all of whom are avid rugby players and all of whom look hale and hearty to us.
So while we wait for him to come home with us, we pray that God will keep him safe and healthy.
We are still planning on adopting him.
This deficiency should not stop him from leading a full, healthy life; we just have to be a bit more careful with medications and food. Here's the Godstop: we know three of the youths in our church here, who have this same deficiency, all of whom are avid rugby players and all of whom look hale and hearty to us.
So while we wait for him to come home with us, we pray that God will keep him safe and healthy.
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