We had our Down's screening this morning. The doctor has to figure in a few factors before she can give us our risk assessment. One of the factors is measuring the space between the folds at the back of baby's neck through an ultrasound. We didn't do so well here. The ultrasound technician said it was thicker than normal. When I spoke to my doctor, she did the measurement again for me, and said that it was just on the borderline.
I really don't want to be here again.
We have to wait for my blood test results before we know more. That should come back in a few days. For now, we wait.
We have spent much of the day in prayer. For a healthy child. For the overall risk assessment to come back as low.
Otherwise the baby seems to be growing well. We got to watch the baby move on the computer screen for quite a while today. The ultrasound technician took longer than expected because baby was on its tummy, and didn't want to turn. There was jiggling involved, and physical turning on my part, to get baby in the right position. But we got to see the spine, the beating heart, the legs, arms, and fingers. It was awesome. Baby looks so cute already. So small, and already so much in my heart.
Rationally I know that the screening is just that, a screening - it cannot definitely tell us if we have a Down's Syndrome baby. And even with a high risk assessment, we're pretty sure that we will not go for more invasive testing. We will pray for a healthy child, and believe God for a healthy child, but we will also ask for the grace, strength and wisdom to parent a special-needs child, if that is what God has given to us. It is not the road I would have chosen, but whatever the result, I remind myself that God is in control.
K worked on this Sunday's worship last night, and chose this song to teach to our church this week. These lines resonated with us today, and we heard God:
I have a Maker
He formed my heart
Before even time began
My life was in his hands
I have a Father
He calls me His own
He'll never leave me
No matter where I go
He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls
And He hears me when I call
- Tommy Walker, He Knows My Name
He formed my heart
Before even time began
My life was in his hands
I have a Father
He calls me His own
He'll never leave me
No matter where I go
He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls
And He hears me when I call
- Tommy Walker, He Knows My Name
We thank God that He knows us, that He formed us, that He hears us.
1 comment:
I will be praying for God to meet you where you are and to give you strength for what He has apponted for you in this time of waiting...I know this must be so hard, but I can tell you with grand assurance...whoever God gives you to parent, He will also give you all you need to love them well, especially when you've come to the end of yourself. :)
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